Sunday, October 31, 2010


Sorry I haven't posted in a while. I'm a senior this year and my life has been very busy applying for colleges, trying to survive the classes I'm taking, and working through debate tournaments. This year has been very successful so far in debate. My partner and I won third at the last tournament and I won fifth place in speaker points. I also won fourth place in impromptu speaking and third place in parliamentary debate speaker points. My classes have been going well. I am currently enrolled in a college class from PHC. It is SO hard but with God's grace, I am getting through it.

Unfortunately, in the last several weeks, some things have been coming up that have really tested my patience and maturity. I had a friend who accused me of something I didn't do and another friend lie to an authority figure. Both of these circumstances have been dealt with but I am still left worried. In the first situation, my relationship with that friend has become rocky. I know that she is immature and is just acting on her emotions, but it still frustrates me. I had to make the decision whether it was worth it to stick around and work it out or just walk away and let the relationship grow cold. My mom made some of the decision for me (she worked it out with the mom...hopefully) but I really decided that a close relationship would only bring me down instead of building up my maturity. That was a hard decision. Yes, I will remain friends with her but we won't be trading secrets.
In the other situation, a friend (who is a middle school student leader with me at my church) lied to an authority figure about a circumstance and what she was going to do. In front of the middle school girls that we lead. I was shocked and it bothered me for the rest of the party. Eventually, I had to make the decision about what to do. I decided going to the authority figure and telling him the truth was the best thing to do. So I did that next morning. It was hard and I'm still worried about what's going to happen but I know I did the right thing.

In the next few months, I'm going to have to make a lot of decisions about my future and the kind of person I am going to become. It's going to be hard and they will be big decisions but I know that with God's help and guidance I will make the right choice. I just hope I will know what that right choice is when the time comes.

Monday, July 12, 2010


Have you ever stopped and looked at the sunshine? How beautiful it shiny and invigorating as it shines. Butterflies and ice cream. Pineapple and music. I love thinking about things that make me smile. Life is a beautiful and joyful thing. I love dancing in the soft summer rain and listening to Owl City. 

Sorry. That was kinda random but I'm in a whimsical mood today. I miss my debate friends and my summer is full of debate. I'm sitting with my Parliamentary partner on my couch just playing on facebook and reading some poems. I found this great one that I love that I wanted to share with you.

To Autumn by John Keats:
Season of mists and mellow fruitfulness,
   Close bosom-friend of the maturing sun;
Conspiring with him how to load and bless
   With fruit the vines that round the thatch-eves run;
To bend with apples the moss’d cottage-trees,
   And fill all fruit with ripeness to the core;
       To swell the gourd, and plump the hazel shells
   With a sweet kernel; to set budding more,
And still more, later flowers for the bees,
Until they think warm days will never cease,
       For Summer has o’er-brimm’d their clammy cells.

Who hath not seen thee oft amid thy store?
   Sometimes whoever seeks abroad may find
Thee sitting careless on a granary floor,
   Thy hair soft-lifted by the winnowing wind;
Or on a half-reap’d furrow sound asleep,
   Drows’d with the fume of poppies, while thy hook
       Spares the next swath and all its twined flowers:
And sometimes like a gleaner thou dost keep
   Steady thy laden head across a brook;
   Or by a cyder-press, with patient look,
       Thou watchest the last oozings hours by hours.

Where are the songs of Spring? Ay, where are they?
   Think not of them, thou hast thy music too,—
While barred clouds bloom the soft-dying day,
   And touch the stubble-plains with rosy hue;
Then in a wailful choir the small gnats mourn
   Among the river sallows, borne aloft
       Or sinking as the light wind lives or dies;
And full-grown lambs loud bleat from hilly bourn;
   Hedge-crickets sing; and now with treble soft
   The red-breast whistles from a garden-croft;
       And gathering swallows twitter in the skies.

I think it is so beautiful. Anyway, I'm sorry I haven't really written much. I'll try to do better.

Thursday, May 20, 2010


Well, I have finished school for the year! Unfortunately, none of my debate team is going to Nationals so that means that speech and debate is over for the year too. We are having our end-of-the-year party on Saturday so we're all really excited! This summer will be incredibly busy for me. I am going to three different debate camps and hopefully working one more. I will also be attending a family camp and a church camp. I'm looking for a job too. I will also be trying to start a Bible Study with a few of my friends over the summer. So, to sum it all up, this summer will be busy yet full of opportunity. I would appreciate prayers as I go throughout this summer. It will probably be strenuous and full of a lot of trying situations. I am also trying to decide who my debate partner is going to be next year. I have several options but trying to pick the right one....the one that God wants me to partner with....will not be easy. So, I'm hoping I will know how to make the right decision with God's help! Thanks for reading! :)

Wednesday, May 12, 2010


Have you ever felt like you were the only person on this planet that cared....about anything? That everyone else seems to be chasing after things you haven't ever wanted? That you seem to be the only one that understood there may be more depth and more life and more....just well MORE to our existence than what everyone else wants? If so, you are not alone. Lately, as the debate season has come to a close for me, I have felt that I must now be isolated from the people that understood me. I'm not a frivolous empty headed person who is satisfied with the world. I don't like swallowing what other people hand to me on a platter. I like thinking and feeling and working passionately and with my whole being. I can't be shallow. Its impossible. And therefore, I am alone.

I am the only ME on this planet. I am the only me with my personality, name, and feelings. And because I am so unique, no one in my entire life has fully understood my passions and loves. Because of who I am, I am a dangerous combination who must be careful in everything I say and do. People are so shallow these days that no one seems to care about how things are perceived or even how actions can be taken the wrong way. Selfishness abounds and shallow love, even more. Only a few still hold on to those "outdated" beliefs that life was meant to be more than what I want. Life is meant to be something beautiful, to be enjoyed. And those of us who still cling to the old ways, the laws of chivalry, the laws of grace, of kindness, of selfless love, are outcasts. Even in my small world, I know that I am alone. Yet I choose to remain untainted by the world. I choose to remain who I am. I choose to remain loyal to what I believe life should be. Will you?

Tuesday, March 30, 2010


Well, this is my *humble*opinion of the two colleges I have visited- Patrick Henry College and King’s College.

Lets start with King’s. King’s College is located in the heart of NYC. It is in the Empire State Building and has several hundred students. They offer three majors- politics philosophy and economics, media culture and the arts, and business management. Their academics program is very rigorous and focuses heavily on business, journalism, and film production. They have ample opportunity for internships in NYC in all three of those. I went to one class and it left me confused and bored. It was supposed to be a politics class, but the professor didn’t even talk about politics! He was discussing a book about Sparta they were reading. Towards the end of the class, he did start talking about different choices the king made and why they were good or bad but until then, I was incredibly confused. The professors are nice, energetic, and have a well-developed sense of humor. The college does not have normal housing. They have apartments of three instead of the usual dorms. Also, they do not have a meal plan, so you must buy your own groceries and make a meal plan. The people are nice, but very glamorous. If you are a fashion diva who wants to change the world…..King’s is the college for you! Most of them are from public schools and do not know how to speak, write, and read analytically and with a Christian worldview. King’s does not offer a lot of extra-curricular activities. They have a debate team (but there is limited space with a LOOOOONG waiting list) and a theatre club. That is all but there are ample opportunities throughout NYC to get involved. Most of the students I talked to liked King’s because it “treated them like they were adults” and because of the hard classes.

King’s has two major drawbacks that I saw. The first is the glamour. Because it is in NYC, it attracts a certain kind of person. A nice person, but a person who is not at all like me. It is definitely for people who like fashion, shopping, and living in a very shallow city. The second drawback that I think is incredibly serious is their lack of emphasis on spiritual growth. They do not have chapel, small groups, worship, or any kind of gathering to worship God. It would be very easy for a teenager to lose their faith in such an environment. King’s has an emphasis on academics, not spiritual growth. The students themselves pointed this out several times. Another drawback that is more personal is the emphasis on business and media. I want to go into politics and King’s does not deal with politics hardly at all. It is not the environment I am looking for.

Lets move on to PHC. PHC is located in a small town in Virginia right outside of DC. It has a few hundred students and is only slightly smaller than King’s. They offer several politics majors, a literature major, a strategic intelligence major, and (most recently) a music major. They too have a very rigorous academic program. However, the two classes I visited were interesting and left me wanting more. Even though I came in the middle and wasn’t quite sure where the class had been, I still understood most of it and left intrigued. The professors are kind, intelligent, interesting and VERY willing to help you at any time. PHC has spacious dorms (not very large but spacious nonetheless) that normally have three people in them. They have a normal meal plan as well which is not as bad as other colleges. The food always contains a wide variety and is surprisingly delicious! All of the people at PHC are like me or very close. We have the same interests and ideas. 80% of the people who go to PHC are homeschooled which makes for a very different and not unpleasant experience. They have similar focus and I do not feel like an abnormal “nerdy” homeschooler. PHC offers a multitude of extra-curricular activities. They offer worship team, a variety of sports, theatre, different music options, tutoring, newspaper staff, different jobs around campus, debate and speech, moot court, mock trial, and more. All of the students I talked to said they went to Patrick Henry because “God told me that was where I was supposed to go” and because “Patrick Henry helps us change the world even while we are in college”.

The only drawback that I heard from students and that I saw was that it is indeed a very small college. Everyone knows everything that is happening in your life. That’s hard when you really don’t want people interfering. However, PHC has such a great environment and such a great emphasis on spiritual growth and developing relationships before academics that I feel it is the right college for me. All the faculty said that they were giving us the opportunity to change the world in college. We become world movers even while we are still young and that is what I have wanted to do. I feel like I can go to PHC as myself and be immediately accepted and feel at home. Unfortunately, if I went to King’s, I would feel like I had to change myself to be like the people around me. I would need to become a “city girl” to fit in. I would also probably lose my faith because of the environment I would be in. The faculty at King’s made the point that they were EQUIPPING students to become world changers when they go out on their own. This is not what I am looking for. I want to change the world NOW.

In conclusion, King’s is a great school. I would recommend looking at it and making sure it wasn’t for you, but if you are anything like me (nerd who would like to change the world in the area of politics) then I would sincerely discourage going to King’s.

Monday, March 22, 2010

Well i am in Virginia right now. Currently, at this moment, I am heading back from visiting Patrick Henry College. Its an amazing college with wonderful people. I will blog more details later! Thank you all for your prayers. :D

Wednesday, March 3, 2010


"It was the best of was the worst of times...."

Charles Dickens could have only been talking about one thing. Something that pervades every junior and senior's life. That's right! The search for college. Unfortunately, this is a long and perilous journey that is fraught with people who would like to take your money just so they can instill their opinions into your heads for the rest of your life. Sounds like a good investment to me! not. Well I will be heading out in two weeks to check out two colleges, King's College in New York City and Patrick Henry College in Purcellville, Virginia. I've already decided PHC is where I want to go but the parents say I have to look at some others. Its kinda scary, thinking I'll be at college in less than a year and a half.....But I'm ready!

Watch out world! Here comes me.

Thursday, February 4, 2010


Well, I have decided that I am an idiot! I have made an idiot out of myself in front of pretty much every brilliant person I know....

First, at the Houston Warm-Up, I was talking to a brilliant debater whom I respect greatly. Well, it was late and I was pretty much sleep-deprived. There was a break in the conversation and I hate silence so I decided to tell him that I liked his three-point pocket handkerchief. Of course, me being the smart person I am, I couldn't remember the name. So I said, "I like your pocket thingy!". Brilliant I know (but wait it gets better). I then proceeded to say, "It looks like the Rocky Mountains!". Oh yes, incredibly smart sounding! hahaha well he looked at me weird and said "thank you". Oh wow......well, I also made an idiot out of myself again at the tournament last weekend.

I was talking to another incredibly brilliant debater who asked me how I was doing. I said "nice!" with a perfectly straight face and asked him how he was doing. It wasn't until AFTER we had finished our conversation that I realized I had just told a nationally ranked debater that I was nice

So yes, I don't know why exactly, but I insist on acting like a ditz in front of all the smart people in the world! :P Maybe, eventually I will learn how to talk coherently to an intelligent person! Maybe I can also convince these two guys that I'm really not as dumb as I act. haha well I hope this made you sure did make my friends laugh! Now GO and make your own hilarious mistakes!

Saturday, January 23, 2010


Lets talk about love. I think that there are three kinds of love.

First, is the love that you share with your friends and family. This kind of love is fun! Its something you can share with girls or guys! It really means that this someone is someone you can trust and having fun with them is always great. Oftentimes, this is a special relationship that includes loyalty, friendship, trust, and compassion. You can be yourself around these people and not feel judged. You would do anything for them, even lay down your life. This kind of love is special and is often taken for granted. I love this kind of love. Especially with my friends! I adore hanging out with them and laughing. My sister is so much fun to have inside jokes with and even though my parents are goofy, they can have their cool moments too.

Second, is the love you share with your "soulmate"; your "one true love". Your spouse. This kind of love is everlasting. You can never "fall out of love" with the person you share this love with because it will never fade. You may have hard times, but you will be willing to work through them. This kind of love includes, work, passion, rational thinking, and lots of prayer. You would do anything for this person, even endure painful torture for years. This kind of love can be frightening. I'm scared to death of it! Personally, I've faced rejection and heartbreak (even with friends!) enough to know that it may just not be worth it. I have been told many times that it is, but no one can give me a good enough reason why it is. Sure, God tells us to populate the earth, but Paul also says that single women are blessed! Is this kind of love worth the pain and heartache? I would say, "no".

Finally, theres a kind of love that can only be found in one place: God. Our Savior, Redeemer, Lover, Father, and Friend. He is all the kinds of Love wrapped into one Awesome Being. He will never leave, nor forsake, and everything He does is for our good. He laughs with us and cries with us. This kind of love cannot be described in words. It cannot be put down in a simple blog post. No, only those who have experienced it can know what it feels like. This is a impossible relationship that includes giving up your life, soul, mind, strength, and being and placing everything in His hands. Jesus endured physical, mental, spiritual torture for us and let Himself be killed so that we could have this relationship. I know that no matter what happens to me, I will always have God to help me. I will always have Someone on whom I can rely. I will never be alone. Even if I am put in solitary confinement, God will always protect me. Now THAT is the best and most perfect kind of love there is.

Sunday, January 17, 2010


Well, I just got home from the first tournament of the year. Literally! I just stepped in my door about thirty minutes ago. I have learned several things this tournament and met some great people.

First, I learned that talent makes up for lack of evidence! My debate partner and I only won 3 out of 6 of our debate rounds and yet we still advanced to Double-Octa-Finals and Octa-Finals! Usually, you have to win 4 to advance. However, my speaker points were so high that we "broke" to out-rounds. After we broke, we debated an excellent and BEAT them! We were so shocked and I was so grateful! We had no evidence, but an amazing case.

Second, I learned that God humbles the proud but gives grace to the humble. At our last tournament, the value of humility was revealed to me by another debater's actions and character. I have been trying since then to be more humble and give God the glory for my success. This tournament, my debate partner was not feeling well and it stressed me out greatly. I had to carry all the weight for both of us (telling her what to say, ask, point out, read, etc.). Since I was entered in 5 categories, I was running all the time and didn't have a lot of time to relax and breathe and prepare myself for our next debate round or another speech round. However, God gave me the grace and patience to be able to handle both my debate partner and other people on our team. He allowed me to focus and do well in ALL my speech categories as well as debate! I qualified to Regionals in debate. However, not only did I qualify, but we got 15th place out of 69 and I also got 23rd place speaker award out of 138! I also won 8th place in a speech category. When I humbled myself and did not complain about my partner's incompentecy, God rewarded me.

The third and final thing I learned is about the value of the verse that says, "Rejoice with those who rejoice and mourn with those who mourn." Not all of our team did well. Even though I was thrilled to tears about my teammates that "broke" and qualified for Regional Competition, I was very aware that some of us became discouraged about their results. One of the other team's coaches commented on how close our team has become. We love each other so much and when one is contentious or sad, it hurts the entire team. Encouragement is a powerful tool. I have the responsibility as the official team "queen" to encourage EVERYONE! Even those who may have not done as well. It is hard when you are excited about your accomplishments to take time to try to feel how a team member does when they have gotten discouraged. It's difficult and not really fun, but necessary. In fact, my speech is about that. We need to focus on others and not ourselves. Until we do that, our culture will continue to disintegrate.

This is what I learned at the first tournament of the year. In a week and a half, we leave for another tournament. Please pray for me and my team as we try to become more ready for this next tournament.

Monday, January 11, 2010


I am almost always stressed. I don't know why...maybe it has something to do with the fact that I am a procrastinator. But I am always stressed. Today, for instance, was an INCREDIBLY busy day for me. I had three classes of school (my least favorites classes AND my hardest classes), an MRI to do (on my right wrist), a dentist's appointment (I chipped a tooth on Saturday) and a piano lesson! Not to mention all of my homework for my class tomorrow, AND work to do on my debate and speeches! I am leaving for a debate tournament on Wednesday. As you can imagine, I was incredibly stressed. My tooth was filed down this morning and I missed my Spanish class. I went through my other classes and then left for my MRI. After 35 minutes of sitting COMPLETELY still, my arm was sore and throbbing and I had a headache. I went back home, got my piano books and went straight to my piano lesson. By this time, it was about 5. I was done by 5:45 and my parents surprised me with a trip to Olive Garden with my sister. I was exhausted, emotionally and physically. So, I wasn't so thrilled when I was told I would spend another hour with my extremely LOUD family!
But, as we started eating and laughing, I became more relaxed and was able to enjoy the time with them. I was reminded again what a blessing my sister is as we shared a couple of giggles over inside jokes. I am incredibly blessed with a sweet and loving sister who is tons of fun to be around! I love you dearly Emmy! :D

Also, tonight, I remembered my stress as I began to work on homework. I became overwhelmed with all the things I had to do before Wednesday and everything I needed to accomplish. As I sat for a second, looking at my vocabulary list, I remembered Psalm 46:10- "Be still and know that I am God." BE STILL. We all want to relax, but even when we do, we are always thinking about the next moment, the next to-do list, the next chore or assignment. We simply need to BE STILL occassionally and spend some time with our Creator. After all, that's what He created us to do, isn't it?

Sunday, January 10, 2010

I am a homeschool debate nerd......

And my life is highly interesting! I am a Christian who lives in Arkansas....I was born in Texas but moved to Nowhereville (just kidding!) when I was young. I'm just an average girl trying to navigate the teenage years! I'm pretty random and I love writing, debating, reading, and Ultimate Frisbee! I hope to become Senator for the state of Texas.

I live by this verse:
Philippians 2:1-2-
"If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose."

I hope that you will learn something as I post my learnings in these next years!